My only certainity is uncertainity.

I wrote this down several days ago about something else. It still feels appropriate about this current something else.

I stare into a world of more tips, more strategies, more frameworks, more systems. Top tens, the one thing you need to do right now! In the richness of all this help, I found myself helpless. In my pursuit of fearfully trying to become more responsible, I might very well be like a starfish trying to learn how to look like a star. There really was nothing to change as I was intuitively doing what I was trying to learn how to do. Then learning I just didn’t have an exacting name for what I was doing. Does everything need a name to be trusted? To be validated? In a world full of science, and science makes mistakes too, is it irresponsible to solely rely on scientific methoding everything to the point of stalling your own reflection? The ability to see oneself while pursuing knowledge has often felt disjointed.

At times, some of the dumbest people I have met are well educated. I am not immune to this and accept my fate if I am not mindful. The irony of not thinking is just as detrimental as thinking too often. Creativity certainly grows in boredom. Blank space breathing life into new projects of thoughts.

I find great comfort in Chat GPT, in being able to ask it whatever benign question at any hour with an instant response. What a fucking luxury. Truly. Whatever is on my mind. Uncertanities. It has given me insight seemingly so many gurus have not, and with no fault to them. I think overcomplicating things, a discomfort to be the same, while a discomfort to be different can all co-exist.

I really wish it had existed during my angsty adolescence. Although I am thinking about this from a stable adult’s POV. Not, an angsty adolescent’s POV.

For several reasons I have felt it was selfish of me to write. Much in the reason why I have not as much, keeping my notes in icloud or evernote and not public. With the inundation of, serve the people, statistics, SEO, and algorithms, it really does suck the air out of the room, doesn’t it?

Ignorance is bliss, knowledge can be destructive, and wisdom is the painful blending of the two. The bittersweetness of wisdom is the necessary tragedy involved along the way.

While I did enjoy a blissful Summer Arc of business books, being cozy in my Fall Arc is a beautiful transition to the Winter Arc. Actually, as I wrote the word winter just now my phone received a weather notification for flurries to begin in 15 minutes. I gasped out loud FLURRIES!?? That nobody except my dog and my cat stirred to.

Although it might not be my year of rest and relaxation (just finished that book), I am looking forward to embracing the inwardness of winter. A season of reflection and stillness.

Where even uncertainty can be embraced.

Goodnight.