Pika Poem

July 1, 2020 — 2 Comments

I wrote this about three years ago. On one of my arduous commutes of four hours one way, each week to go to work. The lonely trip, the buses, the skytrain, the dragging suitcases across gravel everywhere. I’ve gone through about ten suitcases in a couple of years. I wrote this about a girl who was my best friend and co-worker, when I realized how toxic our love and friendship was. We were addicted, like lovers. In all the rightfully wrong ways. Running to the phone desperately when the other would text message. Spending all day everyday together. Being apart was painful.

There is a punch to the gut even reading this poem after the years have passed, because the person you once were, is forever gone. Growing pains, hey?

Perhaps you can relate to a time in your life, or maybe right now. Can be a friend, a spouse, an ex. I was reminded of a favourite movie of a mine, Coraline, for some inspiration of this poem. I used to call her Pika, because she was cute to me, like pikachu. I was Kirby, pink, angry, and adorable.

Pika

Glutton of milk and honey

Her gaze sewed shut

Insatiable thirst leads her

Hatred and pain

She walks alone

Burdened and chained

White angels in her bloodstream

Her phantom friends

Comfort the spirit

Her true companions

Sliced with a smile

Pathway of narrow space

Fit for the queen of solitude

The mind, repulsed by gratitude

Leaks currency

Every step she takes

Sewing her gaze more shut

Every step she takes

She runs out of space

Every step we take together

She steps on me

Every body she steps on

Everybody does it, 

She says.

I watch her continue to sew

Breaks a needle

Finds another

Breaks a needle

She breaks needles

I stop following

She keeps sewing

How far away is she now?

I shall never seek to find out

Stuffed Meat in a Bun

May 23, 2020 — Leave a comment

I was such a little shit for my first job. Oh my god, I will admit that. My work ethic significantly improved every single job thereafter. During though?

First, I had my mom give my resume in as I was too damn shy to even give my perfectly typed up resume to the customer service desk. I remember so vividly the feelings of embarrassment but also panic because I wanted money SO BADLY!!! I get the call, i ace the interview, and boom! I’m a vegan/vegetarian/whatever in the deli department.

Wait. I stopped being a vegan/vegetarian/whatever pretty fast.

Gain ten pounds later from stuffing so much fucking meat in my mouth in the cooler. I ate so many stolen corn dogs, buns, feta cheese (straight out of the greek salad bucket), deli meats, cheeses, salads. I worked there for 14 months, and I gave a polite quitting letter on the brink of getting fired. One write-up was for leaving at 9:55 every day when my shift ends at 10:00 (pfft whatever, I had EVERYTHING done! I would be done 9:45 and wait until 9:55). I remember the snitch, too. The older guy, assistant manager I think? Maybe he had an angry crush on me. Another time written-up for leaving the hot chickens on all night. Oops. Third time? Oh probably one of the other. I am sure they knew I was stuffing my tiny mouth with all the meats during my shift.