Talking about the satanist reminded me of the mormon. For sake of how opposite they are and perhaps some would assume certain qualities attached to one type. Many, many, many years before the satanist. I was a virgin, I dated a guy who lived up the road from me and I went to school with. How did I even meet him? I truly cannot remember, I do remember going to church with him. The mormon church. I am not sure why I dated him, I couldn’t stand him as a person. He lived a ten minute walk from me, but would be an hour late for hang outs. Including my 15th birthday party. I resented him for that at the time. We would wrestle and I would aggressively tickle him. He was 5’9, and bounced around with his hands in his pockets, arms stiff. He dresses like an old man, or hipster by later fashion standards. Shaped like a pencil, bouncing like tigger. His last name was Rose which I found fetching. We didn’t do anything beyond kissing. I would clean his room out of boredom and lecture him how messy he was.

I would listen to marilyn manson casually and he got addicted to the music. My fault and against his religion. Ya huh. Blame the goth girl. Manson is a satanist, although I don’t think he quite takes it too seriously. That and from what I know it is more about personal power and accountability. I could be wrong. Around the mormon, I would drink coca cola, as a mormon you aren’t supposed to drink caffeine. Oh, my fault he apparently began drinking it. I never encouraged him to do the things he did. I was myself, existing, and he was influenced, but blamed me entirely for his actions. Back then I didn’t even swear and I was this shy, baffling innocent goth thing. I didn’t even ever see his cock, frankly the mere thought of it even now makes me gag.

I dumped him for a gay, well bi-sexual, but more gay than bi, guy to lose my virginity to. I wanted my first time to be to someone I didn’t love as I believed strongly in that if you loved the person you lose your virginity to you would be emotionally attached and thus stuck. I got known amongst people I knew as the girl who lost her virginity to a gay guy. I think i’ve dated a few gay guys and well, some bi-sexual too. But, perhaps some gay guys refusing to be themselves. This one was absolutely gay, and open about it, but would also fuck girls. But I would not say he is bi-sexual. His grandma banned me from their household for being a bad influence and he is the one who introduced me to BDSM and threesomes. Oh the IRONY. More on him another day.

Moving on, the mormon ended up fucking a homeschool classmate of mine a short while after I dumped him. I have no idea how they even met given she was still homeschooling, he and I were in public school, and he didn’t know I knew her from when I was homeschooled. However, can’t blame that sin on me, boy.